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Writer's pictureMarisol | The SexEd Mum

Embracing Pleasure: Starting the Conversation Early

As parents, there are many topics we find easier to discuss with our children than others. From the basics of hygiene to the complexities of relationships, the spectrum of conversations is vast. One of the most challenging areas for many parents to broach is the topic of pleasure, specifically when it comes to the elusive 'O' word – orgasms. However, it doesn't have to be an uncomfortable ordeal. Let's delve into how normalizing the concept of pleasure from an early age through discussions on different types of joy can pave the way for open conversations in the future.


Joyful child

Why the Hesitation?


The discomfort around discussing pleasure, particularly sexual pleasure, with our children is deeply rooted in societal taboos and personal unease. The fear of exposing children to inappropriate content or being perceived as encouraging early sexual activity often leads parents to avoid the conversation altogether. The lack of proper education and the stigma attached to pleasure only exacerbate this hesitancy.


However, pleasure is a fundamental aspect of human experience, encompassing a wide array of sensations beyond the sexual realm. By reframing our understanding of pleasure, we can gradually introduce the concept to our children in a comfortable and age-appropriate manner.


Normalizing the Idea of Pleasure


One effective way to start normalizing the discussion around pleasure is by introducing the concept through relatable examples. From indulging in their favorite treat to experiencing the joy of playing with pets, children are already familiar with different forms of pleasure. By encouraging conversations around these everyday enjoyments, parents can lay a strong foundation for more nuanced discussions in the future.


1. The Joy of Taste


Introducing the idea of pleasure through food is an excellent gateway for discussions on sensory experiences. By savoring a delicious meal together, parents can highlight the happiness that comes from enjoying good food. Exploring different flavors and textures can serve as a fun and accessible way to connect with children over the concept of pleasure.


2. The Beauty of Nature


Another opportunity to discuss pleasure is through the wonders of nature. A walk on a sandy beach, the sight of a breathtaking sunset, or the fragrance of blooming flowers all offer opportunities to appreciate the simple yet profound pleasures that our world has to offer. Encouraging children to revel in these experiences fosters an early understanding of joy and fulfillment.


3. Creativity and Play


Engaging in creative activities and play is yet another avenue to explore the concept of pleasure. Whether it's painting, dancing, building with blocks, or pretending to be superheroes, children derive immense pleasure from imaginative pursuits. By celebrating their creativity and encouraging self-expression, parents can further ingrain the idea that pleasure is a wholesome and natural part of life.


3. Normalizing Self-Exploration in Children


These moments are good opportunities for normalizing pleasure exploration in children instead of reprimanding them. Children may engage in self-stimulation as a way to explore their bodies and experience pleasant physical sensations. This behavior, which may include touching their genitals, is a normal part of development for many children. It is essential to understand that this exploration is not driven by erotic intentions but rather by curiosity and the pursuit of enjoyable sensations. Parents and caregivers should approach this behavior with sensitivity and provide age-appropriate guidance to help children understand boundaries and privacy.


Building Trust and Openness


By starting the conversation around pleasure from an early age in a non-threatening and inclusive manner, parents can create an environment of trust and openness. As children grow and mature, they will be more likely to view discussions about pleasure, including sexual pleasure, as a normal and healthy part of life.


Encouraging an atmosphere where questions are welcomed, curiosity is celebrated, and mutual respect is paramount can empower children to navigate the complexities of pleasure with confidence and understanding.


Embracing Change, One Conversation at a Time


As we celebrate 'Orgasm Day' on the 31st of July, let's take a step towards destigmatizing pleasure, starting with the young minds under our care. By embracing a holistic view of pleasure and incorporating discussions on various forms of joy into our everyday interactions, we can sow the seeds of openness and acceptance.


So, the next time you're sharing a delicious treat with your child or taking a leisurely stroll on the beach, remember that you're not just creating memories – you're also laying the groundwork for important conversations about pleasure and fulfillment. Let's spark a positive change, one conversation at a time.


In conclusion, remember that addressing pleasure with our children doesn't have to be daunting. By normalizing the concept through everyday experiences and fostering an environment of trust, parents can pave the way for healthy discussions around pleasure and well-being. Let's nurture a generation that is comfortable with their bodies, their feelings, and the simple joys that life has to offer.


Happy Orgasm Day!


Marisol x

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